Halloween is when people put on masks and costumes. When I have gone to Halloween parties since 1993 I have of course dressed as a dominatrix – with a mask. When the party involved clients they too dressed up as slaves or sissies. One of the great advantages of my trade has been that I have never been short of costumes or disguises. Sometimes my clients would just wear a hood, and so preserve their anonymity in public. Fetish clubs love this time of year and some extraordinary parties take place in Toronto.
In my book Dominatrix on Trial I spoke about the many scenes the clients requested. Often they would put their requests in writing. Here is another excerpt.
Dear Headmistress. My name is —- I am a 40 year old single submissive widower presently living in B.C. All I want is to spend the rest of my life as a submissive sissy cross-dressed maid slave serving a group of older dominant mistresses. I am willing to travel anywhere and move anywhere to serve my mistresses. I would like to be called Stephanie. Please send me your illustrated booklet and application form so I can enrol in your academy and begin my real true calling.
In my book Dominatrix on Trial I spoke about the many scenes the clients requested. Often they would put their requests in writing. I have been asked to share a few with you. In these next few blogs I will share excerpts with you:
I would like you to train me in being a sissy because I have come to the realization that I am a girl and I would like to be trained as a girl. Do we live with each other and do we wear all female clothing and how much is it for a month at the academy? Can you train me as a Sissy Socialite? How is this done, and what is the difference in the cost? I will obey you at all times.
As many of you know I have been tweeting quite often. I started doing so at the request of supporters who wanted me to keep in touch daily. I have found it to be good fun, and there are times I look forward to sharing interesting tidbits. There is also a more serious reason for tweeting twice a day. Soon the Ontario Court of Appeal will release its decision in Bedford Versus Canada – Justice Himel’s decision striking down the laws combating prostitution. There will be plenty to be said then, and much will be said by many very quickly. You can be sure I will be tweeting and blogging then.
I have had a lot of requests and questions from students writing papers on the current court decisions on the constitutionality of Canada’s laws to combat prostitution. For those who may not be aware I will offer the following sources of information. My recently published memoir, Dominatrix on Trial, has two chapters about the current matter. Go to the website dominatrixontrial.com for ordering details. Also, there are the links on this very website, terrijeanbedford.com as well as another site I have madamedesade.com. These sources provide the factual information on the matter, as well as my perspectives. In these blogs I will comment further once the decision on the appeal is released and my co-plaintiffs and I, and our lawyers, have had a chance to assess the decision and our options to respond.
What I said in my blog 2 days ago about how I stocked my wardrobes in my houses could also be said about my equipment. I had a couple of clients who were long time S&M enthusiasts, but were also carpenters. They built me a jail cell and some devices clients could be fastened to. Things like chains and fasteners I got at hardware stores. Clients also bought me restraints, harnesses and straightjackets from the fetish stores in downtown Toronto. However I personally selected my whips, paddles and specialty bondage masks. You can see a few photos of the equipment in my book, Dominatrix On Trial.
Some readers of my memoir Dominatrix on Trial have asked me where I got the clothes I wore in the dungeon and so forth. The clothes they are talking about are described in detail in the book and I did make some reference to a couple of the places I shopped. But let me also add here that I was constantly adding, so it was not all bought at the outset. Also, clients brought me items as gifts that they wanted to see me or my staff wear. Finally, it is important to keep in mind that there was a wardrobe selection for the cross-dressers, as well as one for the doms. Most, as I say was bought at the two stores mentioned in the book or given by clients. However, much of what I had, such as leather skirts, boots and gloves, was also bought at second hand stores.
In Canada the public hearings into the serial killing of women by Robert Picton has begun. Picton abducted dozens of prostitutes from Vancouver to his pig farm and murdered them there. The hearings are looking at why he went undetected for so long. I have been asked to comment, but I say that everyone should listen to those testifying before the commission and read the decision. We cited the Picton matter as evidence that the prostitution laws should be struck down, and we won. Yet the government appealed, in less time than it took to get and read the decision. This time, however, the hearings are public and what we said about the laws will, I think, be amplified. But as I say, let’s listen and watch. That means you too Prime Minister Harper.
I just turned 52. Several years ago, when I found out that I had advanced Hepatitis C, and began chemotherapy, I knew that every birthday would be something to be grateful for. I look good for my age and feel bad for my age. Most days I can only function for a few hours at most. On special days in the current legal battle I would, as they say, run on adrenalin. On the days after I would have to recover.
Now I must be selective about how I spend my time. I have heard people say that without your health you have nothing. I don’t agree. Without my health, confined to home, I was able to finish my book. That was a great motivator. I also have had many interviews about Dominatrix on Trial, and have tried to respond to the many who have written. I also make a point to keep this diary and tweet. People have told me they are glad I am staying in touch in this manner, and I want to take this opportunity, my birthday, to thank the many who have sent their good wishes and support.
The decision on the appeal of the September 2010 decision striking down Canada’s prostitution laws is expected in the coming months, if not weeks. We, the parties to the proceeding, will be advised of the date of the release a few days in advance. I have had to wait for numerous verdicts and decisions during my legal battles, and I have learned a few lessons on how to handle the wait. For one, it does no good to dwell on it or worry about it. If I do an interview or respond to correspondence, or do something else tangible, I will think about the matter of course. At other times I work at chasing the matter from my thoughts when I am alone. My friends know they should not raise the topic when with me. This way I don’t burn out. I have the added advantage that Val and Amy, the other plaintiffs, have also done their share. A number of activists have also been very supportive in furthering the cause in the media. Of course the lawyers have as well.
After the activities following the release of the September 2010 decision I turned my energies, when I had them, to finishing my memoirs and then promoting them. If, after the decision on the appeal is released there is another appeal, as most expect, I will have prepared myself for a long process with episodes of activity. That is the way to run the long race – pace yourself.